Approaching crisis but too scared to call.
I've had new symptoms of seeing people/animals that aren't there, thinking weird things and occasionally hearing a voice. I know I should speak to someone, but I've had such bad experiences with the SPA team. Once after speaking to police about a case against my childhood abuser, I felt so desperately suicidal that I called SPA and the guy said "thousands of people have these thoughts every day and we can't do anything about it" Some lady said "look, you're always going to have problems with anxiety" I've very rarely encountered a decent human on these phone lines, although there are some nice employees in the trust in general. I don't like being unwell and I'm scared of getting worse over time, however if I call and encounter a dehumanising and unsympathetic person (more often than not) then it will make me worse acutely and it's not worth the risk.